Saturday, January 26, 2008
Chris Jericho vs. John “Bradshaw” Layfield
JBL returned from almost a two-year absence from the ring to interfere in Jericho’s WWE title match. Having two returning wrestlers in a feud really does nothing for either on of their mojos, but they’re both great competitors and great at what they bring to the table.
Jericho and JBL are two of the best mic workers and the two of them have some how carved an intriguing match despite an incredibly rushed feud.
I’m a huge Jericho mark, so I’m hoping he goes over here, but something really gives me a bad feeling here. I’m expecting a JBL disqualification to give Jericho the victory…
Career Threatening Match: Ric Flair vs. United States Champion MVP
Ric Flair will go over another peak superstar here, though, this time, I think he’ll get a submission victory after inference from Matt Hardy to setup MVP vs. Matt Hardy at Wrestlemania. Thankfully MVP has enough juice so that a loss here won’t kill his momentum.
World Championship Match: Edge vs. Rey Mysterio
There is zero chance Rey Rey wins this match, but they’re two great workers and it’ll be a great match. Edge hits the Spear after interference from the Edge-Heads.
WWE Title Match: Randy Orton vs. Jeff Hardy
I’m surprised how well this match has been built up and how excited I am to see it. Orton has been a solid Champ and I expect him to make it through this match to job to the Rumble winner at Wrestlemania. Hardy has all the mojo in the world with him right now and he deserves to go over here, but it won’t happen… if it does, the roof of MSG will come off. Orton will over by pinfall…
Royal Rumble match
Usually, wrestlers in World Title matches don’t participate in the Rumble, but other wrestlers on the card usually will, so I’m surprised MVP, Flair, Jericho and JBL aren’t listed as Rumble participants. In those 6 slots, two names will come out of no where, 2 will be surprises and 2 will make sense… I’m guessing Sgt. Slaughter and IRS will be the names coming out of no where, the Big Show and The Rock will be the surprises and CM Punk and Matt Hardy will be the two logical slot fillers. If I get one of those right, I’ll be happy.
Now, the 24 listed participants, in reverse order of how good I believe their chances are to win the Rumble:
No Chance in Hell
24. Tommy Dreamer
23. Chuck Palumbo
22. The Miz
21. Santino Marella
20. Hardcore Holly
19. Jamie Noble
18. Mick Foley
Guys They Won’t Push Correctly
15. Mark Henry
13. Shelton Benjamin
12. Cody Rhodes
11. Big Daddy V
With the Right Push, It’d Make Sense
7. The Great Khali
Former Darlings, One Last Shot
6. John Morrison
5. Mr. Kennedy
3. Shawn Michaels
2. The Undertaker
Married to the Princess… and Winner of the 2008 Royal Rumble
1. Triple H
Triple H will win the Rumble, his second, to only further cement his “place in history.” God, I hate Triple H… but I cannot wait for the Rumble. Expect a review Monday…
Friday, January 25, 2008
Nasir Jones first album, Illmatic, is critically acclaimed as one of, if not the, best single album ever released or recorded in the brief history of rap music. Hell, in certain circles, this cd is considered among the best musical recordings to take place in the 20th century.
For many reasons, this album will be remembered as the point at which rap music became a legit art form. The stylings of KRS-1, the lyrical wizardry of Rakim, and the bantering humor of a Slick Rick were all drawn together to create an album whose impact sparked the mainstream acceptance and growth of America's definitive sound.
But there is a dark side to this...
On the track, "Life's a Bitch" one of Nas' homies from the QB projects, a rapper by the name of AZ was given life. He breezed over and through one of L.E.S.'s most laid back and jazzy tracks with an unforgettable verse and delivery, promising that "as long as we leavin thieven, we'll be leavin with some kind of doe" among other gems.
To bad for him the ride crashed to a halt almost immediately. AZ was able to follow up his appearance with some modest contributions on The Firm's : The Album as well as a career's worth of solo projects from Aziatic, to S.O.S.A. (Save Our Streets AZ) , to Pieces of a Man...but alas, it simply was not to be.
While AZ reached a strong level of success for a bastard child, he remains one birthed into the game without direction. He was never able to amount to the success of his "father" Nas, and as a result has faded into obscurity
AZ the Visualiza
Visualizin the realism of life and actuality
Fuck who's the baddest a person's status depends on salary
And my mentality is, money orientated
I'm destined to live the dream for all my peeps who never made it cause
yeah, we were beginners in the hood as five percenters
But somethin must of got in us cause all of us turned to sinners
Now some, restin in peace and some are sittin in San Quentin
Others such as myself are tryin to carry on tradition
Keepin the schwepervesence street ghetto essence inside us
Cause it provides us with the proper insight to guide us
Even though, we know somehow we all gotta go
but as long as we leavin thievin we'll be leavin with some kind of dough
so, and to that day we expire and turn to vapors
me and my capers-ll be somewhere stackin plenty papers
Keepin it real, packin steel, gettin high
Cause life's a bitch and then you die
Who in the hell do I have to sleep with to get a sequel of the movie SOLO featuring Mario Van Peebles? Why wasn't a sequal made? Why wasn't SOLO nominated for at least 3 Oscars and 4 Golden Globes? Martin Scorsese gets an Oscar for Departed but Norberto Barba gets no love for SOLO. Who bribed the movie critics in 1996 to trash a cinema classic? WHO, WHO I ASK! No Justice, No PEACE! I want a Sequel!
Sing it sister!That got me thinking. There's a message I'd love to put on my roof addressed to those fine feathered friends of ours.
"Dear Birds....Fuck off....stop shitting on my car....keep your little beaks shut until 9:00am then squawk all you friggin want I don't care I'll already be at work....if your going to shit on a statue make sure that it's a statue for somebody pretty lame that didn't deserve a statue to begin with....like John Elway....come to think of it he might not even have a statue yet....but I hope he does get one just so that you guys can shit on it....I hate John Elway....not as much as I hate Hakeem Olajuwon but that's a separate discussion....he doesn't need a statue to shit on you can just aim for him personally....crows can ignore this message....you guys are cool....how awesome was that movie with on of you guys in it?....so awesome"
I'd have to have a pretty big house to fit all that on the roof in 10 foot letters but you get the point.
Man oh man. EA Sports did a number on me in the mid 90’s. The games they put out for FIFA, NHL, and NBA literally stayed locked in my Sega Genesis. My kid brother and I would play NHL ’94/’95 for hours on end trying to see how many goals we could score and how many players we could injure on each team. But in 1995 there was a seminal moment for Basketball in video games.
NBA Live ’95 came out, and a star was born. To this point arguably my favorite basketball video game was
Lakers vs. Celtics (Only could use 8 teams)
Bulls vs. Lakers (MJ was actually in this game)
Team USA Basketball (Hilarious to kick
Bulls vs. Blazers (Custom teams was a major plus)
Then NBA Live hit the scene. You mean I can call plays? All 27 teams are available? I can speed up my players with a “turbo” button. Dunk at will with players who have no business dunking, in situations where dunking doesn't seem possible? You got it! Twas a big moment for me. I think I played that game until it broke. It even saved all of your info! My kid brother and I would play as the all star teams, and battle late into the night. I even vaguely remember trading Nick Anderson for Stacey Augmon (Not sure why). Even now 13 years later it still ranks as one of my favorite games of all time.
What you know about Litterial Green fool!?!
Two Spurs games in two nights...egh. I hate watching the Spurs play basketball. I know its being played well and all...but it's so damn boring. Friend of mine, MS, used to drive me nuts in college with all that "Big Fundementals" talk about Tim Duncan. I've never been any less interested in watching a particular player, that I didn't actually hate.
San Antonio 90, Miami 89
Spurs only led 3 times in this game if I remember correctly. Heat had every chance to win this one and end their incredible losing streak, but lets face facts the Heat are patently awful. They are pretty much the only reason I'm not taking daily shots at Isiah Thomas.
Golden State 121, New Jersey 119
Now THAT'S entertaining basketball. Of course Golden State's lack of ability to play defense allowed this game to be close. And god bless Don Nelson. He brought on little used euro rook Marco Belinelli specifically to foul woeful free throw shooter Josh Boone. IN THE THIRD QUARTER. It was hilarious, and the look on Boone's face was priceless. Also Monta Ellis might have a quicker first step than Barbosa. Just a thought.
Thursday, January 24, 2008
Number of reasons people cite for having sex, according to a new University of Texas at Austin study. Reasons include "It seemed like good exercise" and "The person was a good dancer"
Percentage of U.S. adults who have never had sex
According to the article there are four main factors for sexual behavior: Physical, Goal-based, Emotional, and Insecurity-based. These reasons varied from “I wanted to say Thank you”, or “It’s exciting”. to “I was bored” or “I wanted to give someone else a sexually transmitted disease”.
Little late today, actually had work to do. As much as I love the NBA, I'm also interested in the supposed top 4 guys coming out of college this year. So I'm planning on watching the televised games they have left so I can make some informed points...or something like that.
Cleveland 121, Washington 85
Sleepwalking + Perfect game from a big white dude named Zydrunas = total shellacking. Cavs aren't that good, Wiz aren't that bad.
Toronto 114, Boston 112
You probably figured I would lead with this game right, figuring the plucky Raptors defeating the mighty Celts would be a big deal. Wrong. EVERYONE knew the Celtics would hit a rough patch at some point. Most just figured it would be during their west coast trip. Jose "Tego" Calderon (only I call him that) converted a game winning 3 pt play. Somehow Boston ended up with Eddie House taking the final uncontested shot.
Denver 107, Atlanta 100
Marcus Camby is the best defensive player in the NBA, forget what you heard about Bruce Bowen or whoever else. It's not even close.
LA Clippers 111, Sacramento 85
So basically crazy owner Donald Sterling bashes Clippers head coach in the media one day. Next day Clippers go out and destroy Sacramento. If only it worked like that every time. If only the Clippers got to play Sacramento every night. Nice to see white people have a decent guy to cheer for (Chris Kaman).
San Antonio 103, LA Lakers 91
Spurs looked dead in the first half. Came out like gangbusters in the second half. Whatever Pop said to them worked. Get ready for the annual "Spurs start kicking everyones ass" streak.
If you have seen him please call 1-800-MIA-BLAC (1-800-642-2522).
His Fans miss him. Last seen on the Golf Course with a missing arm!
(I'm not a Giants fan, so I can admit that I expected Eli to get fucked in the mouth up at Lambeau last weekend.)
As a woman, my take on sports is a little different. I mean, I pull for my teams, bet like a fiend, and boo Isiah as much as any man, but I constantly think about the undercurrents of loyalty and emotion that make us sports fans.
We all have our rituals, our crews, our spots. They're of paramount importance. When our team is playing, our girlfriends (well, my boyfriend) know to leave us the fuck alone until the game's over. Watching the Superbowl with my boys is more important than spending Christmas with my family. But is it really just because we care which team gets a piece of rubber through a goalpost more than the other?
Being a real fan is like being in a relationship. You invest your emotions and faith, and it doesn't always pan out. Some losses hurt worse than others. Sometimes, your team sucks all season and you're consistently disgusted by them.
But still, you love them. Even if you want to gut the whole organization...fire the coach...bring in as much new blood as possible...your loyalty remains unshaken and you operate under the belief that the other party, your team, will work on shit until it's right.
And I know this more than most people...
...because I am a Heat fan. And after watching the Knicks lose countless times at the Garden, I had to watch them beat my team in their home arena Saturday. Weak.
Still love 'em, though.
Except for Shaq. Fuck Shaq.
P.S. Add the Shrine to Myspace.
And pull through for a drink. This place MUST survive.
W. 134th Street & Adam Clayton Powell.
Wednesday, January 23, 2008
And so without further ado, I give you my 2008 Top 5 Fantasy Players
1: Tom Brady - QB - New England Patriots
Wow, really!? Thanks a ton dickhead. I bet this is what many of you are saying to yourself right now. Well go eat a dick. Brady is the first non-runningback in the past decade who is worthy of leading off a draft. This guy was a scoring machine this season, putting up more than 500 fantasy points in a standard league with standard bonuses, and even in the games where he didn't dominate through the air (@Indy, Miami, @ Baltimore, Jets) he still did a more than admirable job of protecting the football.
So when you've got a guy with a ridiculous offensive line providing him with an offensive amount of time to locate the most talented receiving corps this side of Montana's Niners (fuck the Rams bitch.) and a top ten pick coming on the heels of a Superbowl appearance, I'd say it's safe to pass up on the RBs for a round.
2: Adrian Peterson - RB - Minnesota
Yeah I hear you guy's screaming at the top of your lungs! He's injury prone! He's splitting carries! He's not LDT! Fuck you guys man. There's a reason that they call him Purple Jesus, ask my friends at KSK. So bear with me for a goddamn minute, and let's take a closer look.
Peterson played in 14 games, and was shut down over the last two, with the Vikes collapsing and eschewing playoff competition. So in, effectively, 12 games, Peterson rushed for more than 1300 yards and 12 touchdowns! He did this while splitting carries with a runningback, recovering from a torn LCL in his knee, and hitting the proverbial rookie wall. He also broke the hundred yard mark six times, scored multiple tds four times, and broke 200 yards rushing twice!
This man runs behind the best run blocking line in the NFL, has a legit #2 back (provided the Vikes resign Chester Taylor) who can share the load, and NOT turn the ball over, and will only get better and stronger as he grows into his body (read: performance enhancers)
You skip on him because of his shoulder, or ankle, or knee...and I'll be laughing all the way to the bank...AGAIN.
3: LaDainian Tomlinson - RB - San Diego
This guy is the most consistent force in the history of fantasy football. Two seasons ago he caught 100 passes, in addition to rushing for well over 1000 yards. Last season he broke an itty bitty TD record, crushing 30 TDs in the process, and this past season he led the NFL in both rushing and rushing TDs (and added another four TDs receiving and passing).
So what if he shows up about as big as pre-superbowl Peyton in big games, and who cares if he slaps and pushes people in the locker room after every big game. This is the closest that I have ever seen to a guy whose numbers can be set in stone.
Be aware that in my examination, it is extremelly rare for a runningback to produce more than three consecutive dominant years. Marshall Faulk, Priest Holmes, Stephen Davis, and many others have all conspired to collapse after three years due to a myriad of factors. While it is true that all three of these backs were significantly older than Tomlinson's 28, it is a nagging issue in the back of my mind.
4: Randy Moss - WR - New England
Man what the fuck is this wide receiver doing in my top five?! This guy better be like Jerry Rice in hsi prime or some shit. People who take receivers in the first round, well they fucking lose! While all of the above is true, if you want this guy, you're gonna hafta reach for him. I would take him over Brian Westbrook, Joseph Addai, Brandon Jacobs, Clinton Portis, Willis McGahee, and an entire fleet of wookies. Have you seen this unshaven bastard in his red hood!? He looks like a crackhead! I mean, I honestly believe that the man in the picture sells all kind of dope.
We saw Randy put up an NFL record, 23 TD receptions (sorry Jerry), and catch nearly 100 passes for nearly 1500 yards. No receiver has had a season like this ever (Rice never combined all three of these aspects at such high levels in a single year). There is no way that he will be able to match this past season's output, but even considering a substantial drop off, let's say 85 catches for 1200+ yds and 13+ TDs, you will be getting the best receiver, and most dangerous playmaker in the NFL.
5: Brian Westbrook - RB - Philadelphia
I reserve the right to alter this spot if Donovan McNabb gets traded, Andy Reid gets fired, or Jon Runyan retires. Westbrook is the new Tiki Barber. This guy is constantly all over the field, catching screens and breaking through into the second level, where he is always a threat to take it to the house.
Westbrook played in 15 games, and broke 100 yds of total offense in all but two. While his TD #s dropped this season (only 7 rushing TDs) his consistent production and immense share of the Eagle's offense make him a no brainer in this spot. While his toughness and brittleness are always something to worry about, there is no fear of him losing production altogether as a result of the offense getting pass happy (Peyton Manning/Joseph Addai).
Plus Westbrook is often inserted as a punt returner in big situations, and in leagues that keep track of special teams touchdowns, this could boost you over the top in a big one.
PHOENIX -- Rapper Lil Wayne was arrested on three felony drug charges early Wednesday after federal agents said they found illegal drugs including cocaine on his charter bus at a checkpoint in southwestern Arizona.
Lil Wayne, whose real name is Dwayne Michael Carter Jr., was being held at the Yuma County Sheriff's jail on state drug charges, Capt. Eben Bratcher said.
Carter appeared via video arraignment late Wednesday morning in a justice court in Wellton, 35 miles east of Yuma.
James Tilson, a local attorney retained by Carter and his New York-based lawyer, said his client was not formally charged and his next court date was scheduled for Jan. 25.
"We will find out by Jan. 25 whether or not the (Yuma) county attorney will file charges or not," Tilson said. "He is looking forward to his day in court. That's all I can say right now."
His bond was set at $10,185. Tilson said they were working on his release.
The 28-year-old faces charges of possession of dangerous drugs, narcotics and drug paraphernalia.
Bratcher said Carter was arrested by Drug Enforcement Administration agents at a Border Patrol checkpoint near Dateland, Ariz., 78 miles east of Yuma.
DEA spokeswoman Ramona Sanchez said a Border Patrol canine unit alerted agents to the presence of illegal drugs on the bus. A search yielded nearly four ounces of marijuana, just over an ounce of cocaine, 41 grams of Ecstasy and miscellaneous drug paraphernalia. – AP
Apparently as a Black Person it is sacrilegious to talk badly about Bill Clinton, “The First Black President”. He isn't labeled the 1st Black president because of his ability to overcome great barriers and strife, growing up in the poor south. Rather, it’s because he played the Saxophone, Smoked Weed and got head from an Ugly White woman. Nonetheless, I am still a BIG fan of Bubba, until I uncovered information suggesting Bill Jefferson Clinton is responsible for killing a part of my childhood.
When BUBBA signed the Telecommunications act of 1998 it dissolved multiple restrictions previously placed on the Media Giants. The act allowed the major networks to show adult oriented programming during the coveted 2pm – 5pm time slot. Instead of innocent cartoons -- shows like the Jerry Springer & Maury were allowed into the time slot. Children today are watching programs such as WHO IS MY BABY’s DADDY, instead of cartoons.
Because of the Telecommunication, Bill Clinton and the TV Execs who lobbied the Telecommunication ACT -- I find them GUILTY of murdering the following TV Shows!!! I will be holding a silent vigil for these shows from 3:00 pm to 5:00 pm…
Please hold up your lighter as I read the victim names.
Chip & Dale Rescue Rangers:
Came on after The Gummy Bears and only lasted a couple years but they were so cute… They were the older version of Alvin and the Chipmunks if you think about it!
Ducktales: What did Louie, Huey and Douie do to deserve such a death? WHAT DID THEY DO? Swim in Uncle Scrooge’s Money Bank one too many times?
TaleSpin: Who didn’t love big Ol’ Ballou? A spin-off off the Jungle Book, I blame Rickie Lake for their death, FAT BITCH!
Darkwing Duck: He Saved countless ducks in his cartoon and do you know how he was rewarded? Was killed flying south through Iowa in 2000 when George Bush was campaigning. Bush was trying to show he was a real Southern and a member of the NRA and shot Darkwing while he was migrating!
Goof Troop: Who didn’t love Goofy? The forgotten man of Disney! All he wanted to do was get away from Mickey Mouse’s’ shadow and coke problem. He landed his own show in 1995. His show was suddenly taken off the air and he disappeared for ever. Some people say Mickey had something to do with it but he was in rehab when the disappearance occurred! The last sighting of Goofy was in Virgina, at the Bad News Kennels.
Anamaniacs : They were suppose to be locked in the VAULT for ever but Spielberg let them out. They were mysteriously trapped in the closet with R. Kelly but there has been no proof, Dot will not testify against Kelly and is currently living on his estate in Chicago.
Gizmoduck: I can’t even say enough about Gizmoduck, he was featured on three other cartoons… Ducktales, Darkwing Duck and Gizmoduck… Poor guy… So what if he was busted for using steroids. After he was canceled and replaced by The Sally Jesse Raphael show he committed suicide. Some say it was the steroids, I say it was due to the betrayal by Clinton.
Tiny Toons is one of my favorite cartoons of all time. Sadly, child stars always fade fast do the high life. Babs Bunny is apparenlty turning Trixs in California and Buster Bunny never recovered from the Murder of Bugs Bunny. . Buster was last seen in Vegas working magic shows. He is a functioning alcholic and has more chidlren then Shawn Kemp.
Save by the Bell: Was the only show to survive the purge and to be honest it thrived. But the success was also their demise. Lisa, my imaginary wife at the time has only been in one Movie of note, since Save by the Bell, “How High”, Zach has had a solid career, Jesse ended up on Showgirls and has been doing soft porn on Skinamax, Slater went on Dancing with the Stars, and Screech made a home made porno and got coked out of his mind with Mickey.
The 1998 Telecommunications Act Ruined Everyone
I wish more people cared about basketball. We're really in the midst of one of its better seasons, and most of the country couldn't give a damn.
Phoenix 114, Milwaukee 105
Much closer than it needed to be. Nash drops 37 day after I call Chris Paul the best PG in the NBA (he still is Nashie, sorry), obviously he must be reading this. Who the hell knows whats going on in Milwaukee. Outside of Redd, Bogut and Mo Williams, who do you really covet on that team?
Sacramento 128, New Jersey 94
I'm originally from The Jerz, so I always have special spot (by special I mean haphazard interest) for the Nets. God are they terrible. I watched them over the weekend and I've never seen a more disinterested club. Vince Carter is like poison for the NBA. All the talent in the world, but the same amount of courage and heart as the guy Daniel Craig played in Road to Perdition. Seems they might be on the verge of a big trade, but unless they are freeing themselves of VC, it won't help.
"No, maybe I can't win, maybe the only thing I can do is just take everything he's got. But to beat me, he's gonna have to kill me, and to kill me, he's gonna have to have the heart to stand in front of me, and to do that, he's gotta be willing to die himself and I don't know if he's ready to do that. I don't know, I don't know."
"I could have killed 'em all, I could kill you. In town you're the law, out here it's me. Don't push it. Don't push it or I'll give you a war you won't believe. Let it go. Let it go. "
"You're a disease - and I'm the cure."
(Over The Top) "The world meets nobody halfway. When you want something, you gotta take it."
(Lock Up)"Well, one night these punks broke into the garage and put a beating on old man Galetti. The whole neighborhood knew about it. The cops knew about it. But I guess these punks were connected, so the cops didn't do anything and I did. So after all the smoke had cleared, these guys ended up in the hospital and I ended up doing 18 months in Treadmore for aggravated assault."
Judge Joseph Dredd
(Judge Dredd)"I am the law! Put down your weapons and prepare to be judged."
Do you know who the man in the center of that picture is?
You should. It's the magnificent Chris Hansen, obviously talking to some idiotic pedophile who thought talking to a young girl on the internet was a wonderful idea. I really could find zero to watch last night, but at the last minute, I flipped past MSNBC and lo and behold, To Catch a Predator was on. Instant hour of entertainment. I could go on for hours about how utterly entertaining this show is, but a friend of mine wrote about it recently, and probably did a better job than I'd ever do.
Chris Hansen rules!
To Catch a Predator Running Diary - Copy and Cigarettes
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